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If The Rapture Happened Right Now, What Would Happen To Your Pets?
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If The Rapture Happened Right Now, What Would Happen To Your Pets?
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At Eternal Earth-Bound Pets USA, for a fee of
$135 (plus $20 for each additional animal), your bird, cat, dog or other caged animal will be collected within 24 hours of the Rapture. Or you can choose the services of After the Rapture Pet Care,
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NORAD Rapture Tracker
The North American Aerospace Defense Command has today announce it’s intention to track the Rapture, as a curtain raiser to tracking the End of the World.
Commencing at 6pm on Saturday the 21st May, NORAD will use it’s highly acclaimed “SantaTracker”
network of satellites and webcams to follow the Rapture from it’s beginning in Fiji and New Zealand and on, through the Far East, Asia, Europe and finally to the United States of America.
It is expected that the Rapture will change speed as it travels the world time zones. This may mean that the Rapture arrives a little earlier or later than expected in your local time zone, and so you should be prepared a little early, and not be too disappointed if you are still here a little later than you expect.
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Planning for the Unsaved
From Billy Bob Neck’s Website of Bein’ Good Post Rapture Planning: Caring For Your Unsaved Loved Ones
It is a sad and worrisome fact that when the Rapture comes some will remain on Earth despite the best of efforts of fine Christians and Christian websites such as this one to inform and educate the Godless, the wicked, the ignorant and the homosexuals as to the fate that awaits them.
Theologians struggle to explain why the unsaved remain stubbornly defiant to God’s inescapable and well-documented will. As yet, no one has found a satisfactory theory….I would like to address the issue of how best to care for the un-raptured left on this Earth to wallow in the misery and weep bitter tears of regret for their hubris.
For tips on how to prepare shelter, childcare, currency, credit, sustenance, tools and transportation, read the entire post at Post Rapture Planning: Caring For Your Unsaved Loved Ones.
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Bumper Sticker Brigade
One of the biggest problems facing those of left behind will be the abundance of driverless cars left on earth. A number of bumper stickers have been created to address this situation…
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Post Rapture Looting
You know someone on Facebook would create a perfectly irreverent event to celebrate the end of the world–and thus, the Post Rapture Looting event was borne. According to the event’s planners, “When everyone is gone and god’s not looking, we need to pick up some sweet stereo equipment and maybe some new furniture for the mansion we’re going to squat in.”
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Blondie: Rapture
What better way to celebrate May 21st than with new-wave band Blondie? Rapture, the second and final song to be released from the band’s 1980 album Autoamerican, was released in January 1981 and may be the perfect soundtrack for the big day.
.
If The Rapture Happened Right Now, What Would Happen To Your Pets?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
At Eternal Earth-Bound Pets USA, for a fee of
$135 (plus $20 for each additional animal), your bird, cat, dog or other caged animal will be collected within 24 hours of the Rapture. Or you can choose the services of After the Rapture Pet Care,
-------------------------------------------------------
NORAD Rapture Tracker
The North American Aerospace Defense Command has today announce it’s intention to track the Rapture, as a curtain raiser to tracking the End of the World.
Commencing at 6pm on Saturday the 21st May, NORAD will use it’s highly acclaimed “SantaTracker”
network of satellites and webcams to follow the Rapture from it’s beginning in Fiji and New Zealand and on, through the Far East, Asia, Europe and finally to the United States of America.
It is expected that the Rapture will change speed as it travels the world time zones. This may mean that the Rapture arrives a little earlier or later than expected in your local time zone, and so you should be prepared a little early, and not be too disappointed if you are still here a little later than you expect.
---------------------------------------------------------
Planning for the Unsaved
From Billy Bob Neck’s Website of Bein’ Good Post Rapture Planning: Caring For Your Unsaved Loved Ones
It is a sad and worrisome fact that when the Rapture comes some will remain on Earth despite the best of efforts of fine Christians and Christian websites such as this one to inform and educate the Godless, the wicked, the ignorant and the homosexuals as to the fate that awaits them.
Theologians struggle to explain why the unsaved remain stubbornly defiant to God’s inescapable and well-documented will. As yet, no one has found a satisfactory theory….I would like to address the issue of how best to care for the un-raptured left on this Earth to wallow in the misery and weep bitter tears of regret for their hubris.
For tips on how to prepare shelter, childcare, currency, credit, sustenance, tools and transportation, read the entire post at Post Rapture Planning: Caring For Your Unsaved Loved Ones.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Bumper Sticker Brigade
One of the biggest problems facing those of left behind will be the abundance of driverless cars left on earth. A number of bumper stickers have been created to address this situation…
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Post Rapture Looting
You know someone on Facebook would create a perfectly irreverent event to celebrate the end of the world–and thus, the Post Rapture Looting event was borne. According to the event’s planners, “When everyone is gone and god’s not looking, we need to pick up some sweet stereo equipment and maybe some new furniture for the mansion we’re going to squat in.”
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Blondie: Rapture
What better way to celebrate May 21st than with new-wave band Blondie? Rapture, the second and final song to be released from the band’s 1980 album Autoamerican, was released in January 1981 and may be the perfect soundtrack for the big day.
.
